We may think that we are superior to our partner in all aspects, or just in some significant ones.
The compromise here does not refer to whether the person is suitable as a partner or whether the partner loves you, but whether the partner is, generally speaking, above, below, or equal to you or to other available partners.
” If I had a dollar for the number of women who have said that to me, well, let’s just say I’d be writing this from Tahiti, not Los Angeles.
And I can’t disagree with you: attraction is NOT a choice.
You’d make adjustments if you alienated your co-workers and wanted to feel better from 9-5 every day. And a big reason you struggle to connect with men is because you’re so bright. Like many of you, I’m a bit of an intellectual snob.
Now before you decide that you hate me, I’d like you to consider two things: First, does that description remind you of any of the men you’ve dated in the past? On the other you get a narcissistic, difficult, self-obsessed, coldly logical man who is much more concerned with ideas than feelings, and much more concerned with himself than with you.
On one side, you get a brilliant, stimulating mind, which really turns you on… Before I forget, there was one other thing I wanted you to consider: Very smart.
Sounds like the price you pay for dating a great conversationalist is pretty steep, huh?
In this kind of compromise, you acknowledge the partner's inferiority compared to you or to other people, and this is very painful and insulting for both of you.Can such awareness be tolerated, and can it be avoided? The comparative value of the partner "Comparison is the death of joy.” Mark Twain In his excellent book, Passions within Reason, Robert Frank tells the following story about a woman who asked her colleague the following question: "Why is it that the people I fall in love with are never interested in me, whereas the ones who do fall in love with me are never the one I care about?" Her colleague replied: "You're an 8 constantly chasing after 10s, and constantly being chased by 6s." How could this woman know that she is an 8 and not a 7 or a 10? Once you evaluate your partner to be inferior to you in an overall manner, you are faced with making a profound romantic compromise in terms of the partner's value as a person who exists independent of you. All women do.” Lady Astor Some people become aware on their wedding ceremony that their partner is inferior to them.This kind of awareness can prove to be disastrous for their future relationship.Kindergarten teachers, we imagine, are unlikely to appreciate the implicit connection the hedge funder makes between their profession and an inferior degree of professional success. Or are me and the anonymous hedge fund guy onto something? CNBC's Nicole Lapin doesn't think Carney's onto anything.Smart women have the same incentives as less intelligent women to date smart men, she contends: "First, if there is indeed more competition for [smart men] ... They can be endlessly fascinating and even more frustrating. And yet you still say you want a man who is smarter than you are. Sounds like a pretty exhausting relationship, doesn’t it? It does mean that you need to accept men who are not in the 98th percentile of intelligence, and recognize that there are plenty of amazing, bright, relationship-oriented men who may not be smarter than you. They have enough information and ammunition to be impossible to argue with. That does NOT mean that you are going to find yourself with a man who has never read a newspaper, who has no interest in foreign travel, or who can’t keep up with you and your friends. is not the likeliest forum for a debate about dating.But when the financial news site does broach the topic, it's probably the only place that discusses courtship in terms of "call options" and "unmet arbitrage opportunities." Here's how it all started.